Wednesday, 2 May 2012

A Quiet Week

It’s been a quiet week. My treatment at Maidstone on Thursday went well with only minor delays. The heavy rain and wind kept me grounded over the weekend as I find it hard to breathe in the wind. The sun shone on Monday and it was warm so we sat for a while down on the prom. The tide was out and Alan was threatening to bring home the seaweed for the garden! While I was sitting there I was thinking how this awful disease is progressing as I cannot walk far at all now without getting out of breath. Watching other couples strolling, jogging, cycling made me feel so sad – this is what we retired here to do! Hate it!

I did get to the optician to sort out these new single lens glasses – can’t get on with them at all. I think I have worn varifocals since they were invented so all this on and off with the damn things is not going to work and I keep getting the chain caught up with my earrings! Life’s hard! Have yet more glasses on order –and so expensive – just under £400 just for the lenses!

On Tuesday morning I went to my local hospice to meet with my Macmillan nurse. It was a difficult (emotional) meeting. My only previous experience of a hospice was when my lovely dad died and this has many bad memories. However things seem to have a changed a lot since then and although people do still go there for end of life care it seems to be more a social center. We talked about lots of things that needed to be talked about. I am going to see them for breathing management and supportive therapies (reflexology, aromatherapy etc). My lovely nurse Jenny could not have been kinder. I came out feeling much more positive and much less anxious. Alan found the meeting useful too.

In between rain storms Alan has been busy in the garden. Spuds and broad beans are sprouting, carrots, dwarf french beans and beetroots have been planted and geraniums that have been in the porch all winter have been planted out and more cuttings taken. Thank you Ray for the veggie funnies.

I have managed some online shopping this week – a few crafty bits for me and new Arsenal outfits for Ethan & Lilah as they have grown out of last season’s outfits. ‘Come on you Reds!’

My trial treatment has been changed to Friday this week as I have a CT scan as well and I didn’t fancy making the journey two days running. Tess x

‘Give your stress wings and let it fly away.’


  1. Hi Tess,
    I'm so sorry to hear that your breathing is becoming so difficult. I can't imagine how frustrated you must be. I'm glad your visit to the hospice was a positive one and you find your nurse Jenny so kind.
    Warn Alan not to take seaweed from the beach for the garden. It has to be processed to remove the salt - which can damage a lot of plants.
    Beryl xx

  2. Sorry to hear you're finding it hard to do all the things you want Tess, it must be so upsetting for you. Great news about the lovely hospice though and hopefully the breathing management will be a big help to you
    Claire xx

  3. So glad you found the Macmillan nurse meeting helpful and positive. Wonderful people. Just take all the help and treatments you can get, I am sorry you find breathing so difficult outside, perhaps some sunshine will make things easier.

    Janet xx

  4. Ray has the same problem with breathing in this windy weather, life can seem so unfair but am glad the hospice visit went well. good luck with the scan on Friday, seems to be a busy day for so many of us.

  5. Pleased you like your nurse Jenny and can talk with her. I am sorry the breathing is stopping you doing what you would like to do. I bet your duo look cute in those kits, even if they are Arsenals! Thinking of you Tess.
    hugs and prayers Jen x

  6. Bernard and Margaret5 May 2012 at 03:43

    It is a privilege to read your blog,Tess, and we are full of admiration for you both. You have shown great courage and determination. We know that you will keep fighting and we send you our love.

  7. So sorry that your breathing is stopping you do the things that you would like to do Tess, it must be so frustrating for you.I think that you have to be a special kind of person to be a McMillan nurse and you seem to have found a wonderful one, I am glad that she is such a help to you.
    I can't wait to see piccies of Ethan and Lilah in their cute football kits
    Trish xx